28 April, 2013

little ol' moi in the big apple

spent an absolutely fabulous few days in new york with my good friend d. we walked our feet into a blistery storm, drank too much wine and slept not nearly enough, but gods above, we laughed enough to make up for everything. d lives in brooklyn's park slope, in a gorgeous high-ceilinged pre-war apartment. because i am taller, she asked me to help her change the lightbulb in the kitchen. i took one look at the little step-ladder and realised it was far too short to reach. while she looked for a spare lightbulb, i grabbed one of her two barstools and started to pull it to the middle of the kitchen.

moi: hey, can i use this? is it safe to stand on?

d: hmmm... not sure. i suppose so.

then i looked up and realised that as she was uttering those words, she was standing on the other barstool rummaging in her upper cabinets for the lightbulb. we looked at each other and burst out laughing.

i have to say that there's very little in the world better than someone who really gets you, and i have been beyond blessed in my life with so many fabulous friends. and yes, i'm also talking about you, you know who you are!

11 April, 2013

just fine

note i left on my dirty wineglass today, so my fabulous roommate doesn't get any wrong ideas:

"this is NOT my wineglass. no idea whose glass it is. only degenerates would drink 2 glasses  1 glass of wine before 2 in the afternoon. right?"

in the defence of degenerates everywhere, sometimes a morning exam takes a whole lot our of ya, you know?

08 April, 2013


today i got an A on a project that likely deserved an A-.
the other day, from the same prof, i got a B on a project that likely also deserved an A-. is he trying to average things out or keep me guessing?

almost over, my little poultries, though how i shall get through the next two weeks is beyond me. keep your appendages crossed, eh?

06 April, 2013

salmonella of the mind

today i woke up nice and early and set off on great cerebral adventures. i had 3 projects/thingies on the go, which makes for a truly ADHD experience: at one point i had 4 PDF files open, word, photoshop, 3 indesign, and 4 illustrator files (yes, dear poultries, i've become a full on adobe whore) as well as approximately 7 different websites. there came a point sometime around 6:59 that i realised i was doing nobody any favours and should call it a night.

because my mother's been making less-than-subtle comments on facebook regarding my evening diet of  chocolate peanut butter ice cream (haagen dazs, i'm looking at you), i decided to have a salad, which is, like, you know, healthy and shit, poured myself a glass of wine and decided to watch tv.

sadly, my fabulous roommate decided to visit his parents this weekend and left me all alone while he went off gallivanting (wait, visiting elderly parents is likely not really gallivanting, is it? but still!). the problem, you see, other than missing his wit and all, is that i spent all fucking day at the dining room table, etching the curves of my still-admittedly-not-half-bad buttocks into the firmly wooden dining room chair, and if i was gonna go and watch me some nice relaxing telly, i'd have to remain in this position for a while longer. but why, quoth you, when in the basement there is a huge flat screen television, comfy recliners with cup holders and blankets and shit? well, darlings, because when no less than 4 remotes are required to turn on said television it is simply beyond me. yes, things are at the point where i cannot turn on the television by myself. even mister monkey, when he visited, took a good 15 minutes to figure this shit out, and he's a bloody engineer! what is wrong with our world that turning on a telly requires a PhD in astrophysics, huh?

so yes, here i am, still etching my ass cheeks into the oaken seat that has cradled them gently since roughly 8 this morning. 2 weeks and i am off to new york city for a much needed bit of r'n'r, but we can't think about that yet. it's all baby steps from here on, my darlings, but if i were to have a moment of madness and take a big fat wide angle goggle, i'd say, fuck! i'm almost half-way done this crazy adventure, and lo, it has been GRAND!

edit. note: i decided to be wild and watch my shows on the couch! my ass doesn't know what hit it!

02 April, 2013


you know it's been a less than stellar week emotionally speaking, when several random classmates come up and offer you a hug.

apparently i appear a lot more frazzled and/or stressed out than i feel on the inside.

then again, my interior frazzlement is nicely regulated by little pink pills: essentially i've been phoning in most of my negative emotions for the past several months. however, being a bit of a drama queen (yeah, yeah, i know you've never noticed) i continue to swear up a storm, kick things and threaten undergrads who can't seem to grasp the simple concept of two way doors, while fantasizing about sending those incapable of flushing toilets or washing their hands without spraying demijohns of water all over the counters to the nearest north korean gulag* but other than that, you know, i'm calm...ish.**

*and really, about north korea - i don't know whether i should laugh or cry, but hot damn, their beloved leader's photo ops are simply brilliant - such depth of emotion, such drama, such inspiring poses! why, it's just like a chinese communist opera!

**ok, with the notable exception of my emotional handling of the affair of the one prof who seems to have taken an irrational dislike to me (and by extension my most esteemed partner). that shit gives me anger that eats right through the little pink pills.

(a few minutes later, i told my fabulous roommate about being offered hugs and what people must surely think of my mental health. he said that perhaps it just meant people thought i was huggable. somehow i think not.)

an egg, by any other name...

sitting down in studio with j, working on a presentation this morning. she starts to unload her lunch just as several people join us.

j: sorry if my lunch smells like egg!

moi: what is it?

j: an egg.