02 August, 2010

FREE HUGS!

i don't care if the original video is charming and warms the cockles of even my bitter black heart, the fact is, these days you cannot go to a single music festival or public gathering of humanity without being accosted by the ever-so-slightly creepy FREE HUGS kids.

they look like acne-prone bible camp participants for whom "hugs" are an obvious and sad ploy to get some jesus-approved physical action that is as close to sex as they are likely to get. they are often physically awkward and, better yet, surly. this actually cracks me up - a surly teenager in a stained t-shirt with a FREE HUGS placard. really? no, thank you.


why all this? no reason. just sitting around in my bathrobe and thinking. hugs?

7 comments:

Alison Cross said...

I can honestly say that I've never come across a Free Hugs kid. But then, I've not been to any festivals other than the local Agricultural Show. Anyone offering free hugs at hte Cattle Show would be frog-marched out by the local constabulary and charged with indecent assault...

Ali x

WV = tacky (strangely appropriate for the subject of free huggers)

the polish chick said...

consider yourself lucky. we went to a street art festival in vegas (trying to avoid "the strip") and the free huggers were actually fairly aggressive there. walking down the street was like running the gauntlet with all of them. ick.

"free hugs at the cattle show" would make an awesome title for a coming of age novel set in the midwest, no?

puncturedbicycle said...

"a surly teenager in a stained t-shirt with a FREE HUGS placard" - hysterical!

That video is quite touching - this said by someone who struggles to not cry during those Kleenex ads, and also during the Mastercard ads in the airport - but like you I remain cynical about the real-life application.

And in Vegas? The least likely place I'd be considering hugging a sign-carrying stranger? Um, no.

Country Gent said...

I was hit up by three business types last month downtown Edmonton (Jasper and 109th). The two ladies were in dresses and the man was wearing a nice pin stripe suit. And the placard was a nice Times font, fresh off the printer. I was so thoroughly pleased that I got hugs both times I passed them. It's funny because the young girls down at the Folkfest wearing those Free Hugs t-shirts have never offered me a hug. Hmmm.

the polish chick said...

are you sure they weren't handing out "the watchtower"? you might have given them a shock when, instead of taking their jesus lit, you hugged them.

or perhaps it was a them building exercise. either way, it unnerves me.

the polish chick said...

another thought - free hugs? what's the alternative? are they gonna charge us 5 bucks a pop? hooker lite?

Anonymous said...

I wonder if any of the "Free Hugs" kids ever get snuffed? You know, the hug trick goes bad. After all you're opening yourself up to strangers. But I can't wait to see free hugs on wreck beach.