as i cleaned her teeth i thought and thought and experienced a sudden epiphany: she is about food the way i am about horses and boats.
i will (semi)enthusiastically ride a horse* provided its oil has been changed and its hooves polished (or whatever it is one needs to do to a horse to make it ready to ride; i really don't want to know). afterwards, you can take the horse away and lube its glands or hoover its mane. i don't care. just don't ask me to participate.
boats? same thing. i shall get on a sailboat and look pretty. hell, i'll even sheet in or out, provided you give me clear instructions, but if you want me to roll the ropes into neat little serpents, or to scrape barnacles from the hull, well, you'll have to find yourself another sucker, 'cause i'm out of there.
and this is precisely the way this woman felt about food: she likes the finished product but has no interest whatsoever in the work required to bring it to the table.
this for some reason made me respect her oddness and i promptly changed the channel to "breakfast at tiffany's," 'cause dude, who doesn't love "breakfast at tiffany's"?
* i assume. it's been a good long while.