19 January, 2010

"the house that the squirrels ate" by william shakespeare

"tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, creeps in this petty pace from day to day," quoth macbeth, and i quoth him, faultlessly it seems (i checked that most thorough and trustworthy of wikisources) despite the vast chasm of time betwixt moi and the learning of it (grade 10, gentle readers, many maaaany years ago).

a point? you want a point? too fancy shmancy for me to be randomly quoting shakespeare at you, you say? well, alright then. let's roll up the sleeves and dig up a point.

tomorrow (hint: references opening sentence, AND explains things! is this a segue i see before me?) our house will officially be sold. the house that mr. monkey and i spent two years buffing up to a high gloss shine and whose roof has been shamelessly gnawed by satan's little minions, the squirrels (yes, the cuteness is just a ruse, for inside they are pure evil, unadulterated!), to the tune of 5K off the selling price. the house will be gone and we will be free of shoveling snow and mowing lawns and fretting about squirrel-mediated roof cave-ins. sigh. it will be a good day and i hope you raise a glass in a toast to stupid people who waste their lives making lovely domiciles for someone else.

recent conversation with mr. monkey concerning the above:

mr. m: you know, when we get the money from the house, i'd like to use it for something that will give me satisfaction...something that will make me happy.

moi: (nodding sagely and thinking about land) of course, of course.

mr.m: i was thinking of a maserati.

moi: hm, and how much do those puppies cost these days?

mr. m: about that much.

moi: so if we lose everything else, we can always live in the car? "we're homeless, we live in a maserati down by the river."

1 comment:

Pitur said...

Let him have the mesarati, he put up with Ft. Mac long enough.