04 November, 2009

and another thing

you know, i am this close to giving up on this blog thing here. you wanna know why?

i read blogs, blogs written by intelligent women with interesting (sometimes disastrous) lives. and their blogs are good.  i wonder, is mine as good? well, its merits (or lack thereof) can be debated, as can the increasing tendency to talk at length about food preservation. but i ain't bad. not really. 

so what's my problem? my problem is that to their dozens (or more) comments on every post, i get one comment every dozen of posts or so. if i'm lucky. and i feel like i am standing at a lectern, with my overhead projector humming gently in the background, my transparencies ready, my notes nicely organized in front of me, and as i start my talk, there is no one there. nobody. dust motes dance hypnotically in the light, the janitor pokes his head in to look curiously at the crazy lady delivering a lecture to an empty room, then moves on with the industrial floor polisher, and i drone on.

so perhaps there is that deep seated need to blather at length about all sorts of things that this is a wicked cool medium for, but frankly i can just start to update my facebook status on an hourly basis - i get way more feedback there, and feedback makes me feel like someone likes what i do. otherwise why lie awake all night trying to come up with the perfect turn of phrase for some ridiculous thing i'd seen earlier that day? (well, that is a waste of time, seeing as i never write it down and have rarely been able to emulate in the daytime my nocturnal verbal profligacy) 

but anyhow, this isn't a threat, this isn't anything really, but if i really only have 4 readers, then i might as well shut up as these are people i routinely talk with in real time, and what the hell is the point?

ok. last call for lurkers, or this thing just might just slink off into a dusty corner and jab itself repeatedly in the eye with a pointy stick.

hello? 

anyone?

anyone?




yeah...i thought so.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

you have only as many readers as you're willing to invite. There are some people mentioned in here that cannot be privy to knowing about all of this! Lots of people!

Joan said...

I guess you need to decide why you blog. If it's therapy for your brain and well being, keep at it. If you write for feedback, perhaps consider writing short stories or such. You're certainly good enough!

I personally never understood blogging!There's not too many people that I care about what they think or do, let alone strangers!

Country Gent said...

Writing shouldn't be for the sake of public recognition. Ask yourself if you enjoy it and if you enjoy it enough to share, even if you don't get a response.

There's my two bits.

the polish chick said...

blah blah blah. sure i don't do this solely for the recognition (gee, if i did i certainly wouldn't still be at it), but, as the post said, there came a time where i felt like i was talking to an entirely empty room, save for some crickets chirping. it hurts, sorry to be so damn shallow.

Pitur said...

number 4...

Anonymous said...

I'm with Joan. You should definitely explore other writing outlets. We are just your audience. What you need is a community of fellow writers. You're feeling isolated, and for now the size of your audience is not really the root of the problem. I felt that way about photography until I joined a club and found some friends to go on photo shots with. I got more feedback and gratification than I did when I depended on compliments from my mom.

I'm with Joan on a second point. I read a few entries of the other bloggers you sent me and although they are indeed well written, I much prefer reading you because I know you. I see blogging more like writing a letter to a few close friends.

In summary, you NEED to write. If it's not a blog, than something else. But whatever it is, I will always want to read it (I'm still waiting for those essays).

My two cents...and then some.
g

the polish chick said...

yes, g, but the thing is, all those bloggers i read ARE a part of a community - the blogging community, a community i would so love to be a part of and i don't know how one gets in other than sheer dumb luck.

and i really enjoy reading the blogs of people i don't know (i'm sure i'd enjoy blogs of people i know if they (still) wrote them) and i feel that over the course of a few months or years i do get to know them.

come on, world! get to know me! i ain't so bad!

Anonymous said...

Fair enough. I experienced this too with the photoblog. It was, as you say, a community. There were a couple of people I actually started developing a friendship with as we commented back and forth on each others photos. But in the end I found that I had limited time and energy to spare and I chose to focus it on people I could interact with in person (photo club, Loney). One way isn't better than the other. Whatever works. Have you considered asking some of your favourite bloggers about the things they've learned about getting a following? You might find that they dedicate an enormous amount of time to it (commenting on other people's blogs in the hope that they will reciprocate - it's a bit of a competitive process...that's certainly how it worked in the photoblog). Do you know what you truly want out of doing this blog?
g