19 October, 2009

lipstick? pigs? was there a point? no! there was no point!

i am sitting here, drinking wine, reading whoopee and cooking split pea soup. the wine thing is bound to get me in a spot of trouble. whenever i am unemployed, you see, mister monkey comes home from his long day at the quarry, smells booze on my breath and figures i've been lying about drunk all bloody day long, accomplishing nothing. 

the thing is, i am a very organized person, far more so than average and thus i am able to complete complicated tasks in a fraction of regulation time, thus freeing me up to get sozzled while reading blogs. 

i don't believe in work places that penalize their workers for being efficient by piling more work on their shoulders and so i make my temporary place of (un)employment a good place, a place with a comfortable sofa to lounge on, a big box of as yet unpacked wine sitting in a box sending me sexy little winks, a nice little macbook and damn good music,* a place that allows me a good long booze break once dinner is cooked and important issues dealt with. if only the paycheque was a little more substantial...

*the Day of the Pickling featured polish rap and drum and base so prominently that i kept harbouring fantasies of stabbing out my ear drums with a robertson screwdriver. although mister monkey introduced me to some pretty cool music (garbage, portishead and others) overall our tastes are pretty different. i fear his increasing love for polish rap is a manifestation of early mid-life crisis mode which is, arguably, less undesirable than an italian convertible and teenage hookers.


Anonymous said...

I know what you mean about the efficient employee getting shit dumped on them all the time. And sometimes that reputation for getting the job done follows you from one job to the next. People talk. Damn them.

Anonymous said...

Why don't you drink in the morning before getting your stuff done. By the time Mr. M comes home the smell should have dissipated.

the polish chick said...

if i drink in the morning, i will get nothing done. the big joy of having a drink is having a well deserved one. plus, wine makes my corn flakes go soggy.