02 August, 2009

one more for the "graceful and shit" file

i was hanging curtains in the kitchen today. i took what i thought was a half a step back and found myself completely off the chair i had been standing on seconds earlier. because i knew that the kitchen floor behind me was littered with paint cans, screwdrivers and other pointy miscellanea, i attempted to flop my way backwards onto the far safer (?) tile. i had forgotten about the laundry basket thankfully filled with clean laundry and the one bottle of red wine i had tossed in there as i came up from the basement. 

i managed to upend the basket, spilling a rainbow shower of mister monkey's underoos as well as the bottle of wine. i also scraped my elbow something fierce.

i figured the bottle of wine was fine until i tried uncorking it several hours later. the entire neck was broken but hey, i'm nothing if not resourceful, at least when it comes to alcohol, so i managed to gently uncork it and then pour it into the decanter using a funnel and fine sieve to get the glassy chunks out. 

and if you're worried you'll be drinking glass-filled wine, worry not. by the time you come over, it'll be a whole new bottle, and i will have been graceful in many fun and creative ways. hey, i may even be dead!

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