the only thing better than a 2-for-1 movie deal (pay them twice? are you nuts?) is the spontaneous cooperation that occasionally makes me renew my faith in humanity (i am not talking about the star trek movie, i am talking about a completely random woman offering to hold the unlockable bathroom stall door for me while i went pee, and me returning the favour, while the rest of the sheep stood and stared, their little bladders distended painfully but unable to cooperate in like fashion despite my rallying cry of "we need another tag team here!").
first of all, you have to take into consideration my complete and abiding love for the series. i loved the original when i had just come to canada and was learning the language, and i loved the next generation, though it took me some time to get over the alarming non-styrofoamity of the rocks and the utter lack of sweating captain pectorals.
i know i have fessed up to having had a significant teenage crush on mister spock (a harbinger of years to come spent dating emotionally unavailable men until i broke the mould and married mister monkey, the single most emotionally available man i know) and boy, was i ever proven right - the younger spock? yummy! utterly lickable, from pouty lip to pointy ears.
you can totally see the young james tiberius kirk growing into the sweaty charmingly misogynistic shatner, scotty (shaun of the dead!) is utterly delectable, and bones? well, let's just say that karl urban is one of my few exceptions to not wanting to lick pretty men. and he nails mccoy. utterly nails him. (and speaking of nailing, that'd be a resounding "please and thank you" which in the original? no thanks: too much mascara.)
the villainous romulan ship was a gorgeous swiss army knife slicer and dicer extraordinaire and hey, if anyone wanted to destroy my race and shoot red antimatter gumballs at my planet, eric bana would be my man. delicious. i even forgive him his ears.
so, did i enjoy the movie? hell yeah! i realise i am the last person on the planet to see it (except for that masai shepherd who got suckered into watching the cow herd while the rest of the gang went on cheap tuesday) (oh, and except my husband who got suckered into being responsible for the whole project while the rest of the gang got drunk on molson canadian), but i loved it. i will go see it again with mister monkey when they let him out on good behaviour.
state of play
let's see, we have a fat russel crowe, a wooden ben affleck, a greasy jason bateman, an eternally classy helen mirren, an anorexically cute rachel mcadams, a tired but lovely robin wright penn, and a jeff daniels you just know is up to no good. there are ex-military bad guys, congressional hearings into the big business take over of the free america we all like to pretend was ever actually there, conflicted but honest reporters, good hard working cops, and a political story with a twist. and oh, what a twist. yawn.
it was ok. i'm glad i didn't actually actively pay for it.