06 November, 2007

strong enough for a man, made for a woman

more inexplicable spam:

cutest girls will go horny and wild when you pull out your new big python

which is weird, because most girls, especially the cutest ones, are generally afraid of snakes, reptiles and mice, no? and could we stop it with the constant rush for all things new? i think my old python is perfectly serviceable and i don't want to upgrade, thankyouverymuch. a snake is a snake.

Without any doubt girls idolize hard and big rods.

would this be all girls or just girls that work with metal?

Do you believe in wonders? We think you're likely to say "no". We hadn't believed, either...until the moment MegaDick was invented!What this wonder medicine does to a human phallus cannot be called otherwise than a Miracle! Just imagine, that your love wand suddenly becomes longer and thicker and makes women tremble with excitement!It's fabulous!

i imagine that if my love wand suddenly became longer and thicker it would indeed be a Miracle! experts would be called in, hormones in the water supply measured, estrogen treatments dosed out, and hey, i might even make it big in the talk show circuit! that is indeed fabulous! this woman, at least, is trembling with excitement.

and my personal favourite, a poem with a title that speaks for itself:

don't be afraid to take off your pants in her bedroom

Now that you've met a babe that's hot
You wanna hump her juicy twat.
She looks so sizzling, she's so nice!
But would your penile size suffice?
Not sure she will long for more?
You need a dong she would adore!
But how to raise it long and thick?
Your only chance is MegaDik!
You'll get so wanted super-size
And see great pleasure in her eyes!
Your shaft will bang her poon so deep,
Tonight you'll hardly fall asleep!

who knew the treasures my spam folder was home to? and no, i did not write that last one; all poetical prowess aside, i do not have it in me to rhyme "thick" with "MegaDik."