24 October, 2007

so ferocious

i was reading the sun this morning (only because i had a cancellation and it was the only newspaper available - normally i like papers that feature complete sentences and slightly fewer car ads and nekkid chicks) and lo and behold i read this. so because i am a basically decent human being i experienced concern and worry and all that crap, because hey, these are people i worked with for 4 years. and then i thought, why doesn't the interesting stuff happen at an office while i am actually working there? why does it happen after i leave? nobody ever tried to bite me...wait, that is a blatant lie, but nobody ever tried to bite me on the arm while i was not actively working on their mouth, and i want to know why. i demand to know why.

seriously though, i hope everyone gets well and the perp gets caught and fed some dried frog pills, so we can all go to work in relative safety.

i was also going to make a comment about alberta's oil company oil revenue debate but i am way too tired to save the world this year. in fact, in an attempt to relieve my palpitating little heart, i am declaring a moratorium on books about deforestation, water-wastage, any and all environmental disasters* etc; cbc programs about the above; NPR programs on ditto; and generally anything that will make me feel more anxious and depressed than i am in my natural state. i am diverting lots of cardboard and plastic from the landfill by recycling at my office. that's all i have the energy for right about now.

and speaking of environmental disasters, i have to say i hated driving the company truck to edmonton these last couple of times - i am actively embarassed to be seen getting into a ford truck, worse yet a dodge sheep. and the thing that really pisses me off is that i lose my moral high-ground: how can i flip off hummer drivers with any degree of sang-froid and superiority when i am riding exactly on their level?

but i understand now why so many truck drivers are assholes - i was an asshole too! driving a truck made me into a total asshole. ok, so i still signalled and all, but i think that was residual toyota thinking there. i was rude, cocky, fast and generally a classic lobotomized asshole truck driver. it made me giggle a little. but then i got back into our toyota and had the decency to feel embarassed. so if i passed you these last couple of weekends and you thought to yourself, what a frickin' asshole, i'm sorry. it was the truck's fault.


*i'm looking at you, tony

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