1. do you like spinach? i do. i mean i really really do. even more than i like broccoli. and if you think i am being sarcastic, you really don't know me at all.
2. do you eat the daily recommended 5-10 servings of fruit and veggies? i do! sometimes i hit 5 by breakfast! i loves my fibre! pooping is FUN!
3. is there any reason why the entire female population of north america has suddenly sprouted chubby little love handles that flop over the sides of their too low, too tight jeans? just wondering.
4. how many times have you seen lord of the rings? i'd tell you how many times i saw it but then you'd run away screaming, stop being my friend, and whisper about me with the popular girls every time you saw me in the hallway, and i am just not quite ready to brave the lunchroom alone, so i will not tell you. but i'll give you a hint: LOTS and lots and lots.
5. why don't koalas switch it up a bit? i mean their tenacity is admirable and all, but if your food source provides you with so little energy that you spend 20 hours out of every 24 sleeping, clearly it's time to experiment with, oh, i don't know, hot dogs? marmite sandwiches? grapes? then again, they do have unusually small brains. poor hydrocephalic koalas...
6. will i ever reach a time in my life when my lassitude overcomes my anger management issues? i look forward to the day when being pissed off will be moi, delicately flipping my middle finger at the universe in general, mouthing a slurred "fuck you," all latter day marlon brando-like. hope it comes soon, that blessed day.
7. read any good books lately? i am open to suggestions. nothing about how the world is coming to an end because of our mismanagement of water/resources/environment/poverty etc. but no fluffy stuff either. give it to me now!
8. when will my toe (middle one, left foot) peel off? do you think i need plastic toe surgery? that little fucker always gets in trouble, always!
9. had enough? i sure did!