15 June, 2006

hair 2

i am currently growing out my hair (for guys like my husband reading this - yes, even when you are growing out your hair you need it cut occasionally, trust me on this). i figure it's my last hurrah before i reach my 40's and long hair starts to look lank and used-looking on me. you know the aging hippy coiff of which i speak. of course sexy 40- and even 50-year-old actresses are redefining that whole thing (and who knows, maybe 40 is now the new 20? i'm not up on the latest hollywood trends.) there is of course the updo, which can carry you respectfully into whatever age the male hormones start to outweigh the female ones and male pattern baldness sets in - hopefully not till my 90's. but i figure this is the last time i can do the girlish loose locks without looking desperate or pathetic, or just plain uck. so the deal is this - now that my hair is long, i see it everywhere. it's clogging the drains, lying on the floor in loose art nouveau coils, occasionally gracing my long-suffering spouse's salad; it's in our bed, on my clothes, and pretty much everywhere. so what i want to know is if short hair falls out at the same rate but because it is short it simply fails to make the same kind of visual impact, or if there is some physics law like the conservation of mass that governs hair: that i must have a constant mass of hair on my head and if my hair is short, there will be many of them, but if it is long, there will be fewer in order to maintain the hair mass stability ratio. in order to test this i will grow my hair very very long until i have one extremely long hair and the producers of various freak-of-the-day tv shows will be beating down my door.
p.s. at what age is it compulsory to get the short grandma perm? just wondering.

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